We're moving at a slower pace.

December went at a pretty frantic pace. Grandma Sandy came into town for the girls' choir concert, and we did a bunch of Christmas-y things in Philly. 

We hosted four different large parties: a 30th birthday party for a girlfriend of mine, a progressive dinner with three other families, a homeschool Christmas party with 60 kids and 20 parents (not a typo--80 people at our house) and our annual Christmas Eve party with 41 people. It was all so much fun. I hope to do it all again next year.

I begged this perfectly delightful childhood photo of my friend Rachel and had 40 copies of it made in order to decorate for her birthday party.

We made over 100 cookies for kids to decorate at the homeschool Christmas party.

These pictures do not really paint the picture of how busy the house was during the party. It was CRAZY. But also incredibly fun.

I'm so glad I could capture one kid choking another in this photo.

But since the last party wrapped up, I went into a social coma. We have been just doing the basics, but doing them well, and it feels really good. I'm sure things will pick up soon, but as of right now we have been enjoying more quiet evenings at home.

We did enjoy a nature hike with Forest School this past Friday. We made bird feeders from pine cones and peanut butter afterward, but ours mysteriously disappeared (Dan threw them away).

Gwen up a tree. The branches were flimsy, and everything kept shaking. But I know my Gwen. She has to climb. She has to!
 

And the usual church photo:

Today at church, Beck chose a spectacularly quiet moment to shout out, "I don't like Sister So-And-So!!", who of course was sitting right in front of us. I clapped my hand over his mouth until he was good and quiet. But every time I took my hand off, he would scream it again. So I lugged him out of the chapel, and we ran into some good friends in the hallway. Hoping to redirect Beck's attention away from his latest pronouncements of hatred, I said, "Look Beck! The Cramers! Your friends! You love the Cramers!" And he really, truly does. They have lots of fun boys in their family. But of course Beck said, "They are not my friends! I do NOT like them!"

He is a treasure.

The End.

You Could Be a Farmer in Those Clothes.

Jolley Family, Sunday Morning, Winter-style.

As I write this post, June is wearing her favorite dog-onesie pajamas whilst also sporting her new dragon wings we bought from Goodwill and arguing with me about whether animals and snowmen should get baptized. "Animals are intelligent, MOM!" she yells in my ear as I try to type about really important things like our family heritage and legacy and also what we wore to church today.

Now she's talking about her latest reading of the Fudge series by Judy Blume. Gwen just asked me, "Mom, what can I do?" Harris is wearing his pajamas with his Sunday tie on top. He likes to wear a tie whenever he can, though he still claims to hate Sundays and church and primary. Beck is wreaking havoc in the toy room, but at least he's in the toy room and not IN. HERE.

We went to the farm show yesterday. The Farm Show is a Big Deal here in Pennsylvania. The first weekend we moved here, the Farm Show was going on and people at the hotel we were staying at thought we were in town from New Jersey for the Farm Show. Alas, we were not. I ventured to the show last year with a friend. But it was pretty tricky to do without Dan. So we waited for a Saturday trip to the Farm Show this year, and Dan came. It was cold, and we had to park far away and take a shuttle to the Farm Show Complex. 

(June and Gwen just marched into my room to let me know that they want to borrow their baby blessing dresses for a fake wedding they are planning between Beck and a toddler girl at church they want him to marry.)

The farm show was pretty fun. The kids loved the exhibits and the animals, and we bought the famous PA Dairymen's Association milkshakes. June cried that we made it to the calving corner too late and all of the calves had already been birthed.

I like living in a rural place. I'm not a really rural person, but I appreciate the people and their skills. I feel like a huge wimp around them.

We belong to a hiking group through one of our homeschooling co-ops. It's called "Forest School". During one of our recent romps through the woods, the Forest School leader asked if we would like to take a longer way back. I love walking and said sure. We walked for quite a long time, and I was happy to know that we were almost done because Beck had been more than done for quite awhile. We hit the 3-mile marker, and the leader let us know that we were halfway done.

Halfway? Wut.

The entire hike ended up being close to 7 miles. 7 miles is a lot for a three-year-old, and I had to lug him quite a bit at the end. Luckily, another mom named Jill decided to stay at the end with me and help me. I hardly even know Jill, but she was my angel that day. Just when I thought Beck couldn't possibly go any farther, we saw an old train caboose car. Beck found new energy and ran to the car and played and was able to finish the hike.

Speaking of trains, our neighbors Donna and Dave have invited us to come see their Christmas village train set-up three years in a row. It's a fabulous Christmas tradition for us.

Part of the tradition is having a big talk on the way over to their house about how we aren't going to touch anything while we are there, and the other big tradition is leaving early because one of the kids did, in fact, touch something. Donna and Dave are always nice about it, but it stresses me out because their train set is REALLY nice and takes them hours to set up every year.

And we are trying to be sporty again. The girls are playing basketball. Gwen is aggressive and gets in a little trouble for it. But she also switches from being aggressive to using the moves she has learned in dance classes to play defense. She will jazz hands that ball right away from you. 

June is the reason we signed up. Due to her small size and some of the challenges she faces, the league agreed to place her in a much younger group. Her coaches are saint-like and follow her around and remind her where to stand and what to do. Both girls are enjoying it.

And Harris is wrestling. Meaning, he attends wrestling practice. He likes learning the moves and being a part of the team. He LOVES wearing the wrestling t shirt and sweatshirt (even despite his intense hatred for long sleeves), but as far as actual wrestling goes, he struggles to apply what he has learned. He's only 5. He will get there. It's pretty funny seeing the much older kids on the team try to tear each other apart, whereas Harris just collapses to the ground the second his opponent comes close to him.

Harris is the third from the right, front row.

And a throwback. I forgot to post this picture of my crew ready for church Christmas morning. Dan had bought me a dreamy golden dress I was wearing for the occasion but alas, I took the photo and wasn't in it. My memoir shall be titled Woe is Me: A Mother Martyr, available wherever books are sold.

 

The End.

The End of An Era.

Last week marked the end of an era, but no, that era was not the end of my blog. It may seem that way from the past two years' lack of consistent writing. Previous to that, I was blogging every single week. But when we started homeschooling and I started serving in a busier role at church, blogging went out the window. That stops now. I am going to keep blogging. Yes, blogs are totally out of fashion now. But so am I. We're a perfect match of skinny jeans and blousy tops. I'm having a hard time jumping on the 90s fashion train.

The actual era to which I was referring was the death of Dan's 2000 Toyota Camry. Yes, you read that right. The year 2000. Things have been breaking on this car for years, and we would just power through it. The sweet nothings that my husband would whisper to me on my way to drive his car evolved to a shout of, "If the car won't start, jiggle the battery wires!" The following things were broken on the car:

Cracked windshield

Bad battery connectors 

Broken inside door handle on the driver side

Broken outside door handle on the passenger side

Cracked muffler that needed to be welded back together. This made the car sound SO LOUD. It was not-so-affectionately-known by our friends and neighbors as "The Hot Rod" because it would wake up the whole hood when Dan left in the morning.

Dan has been saying forever that we need to get a different car, but then car prices went up, and we decided to wait. 

I took a meal to someone on Christmas Eve in sub-zero temperatures. Somehow I was able to get into the car (that outside driver's side door handle was still okay), but when I arrived to the lady's house, I couldn't get out of the car. I went to roll down the window to open the handle from the outside (which I was so used to at that point and never thought about the absurdity anymore), but the window was frozen shut. So I climbed over to the passenger side to open that working handle, but the door was frozen shut.

Would this frozen 23-year old car parked in a dark, random parking lot on Christmas Eve be my demise? I had endured too much to go in such a way. Plus, I had 41 people back at my house waiting for me to come back before the kids would start the Nativity puppet show at the Christmas Eve party I was hosting. I had to bust out of the Hot Rod. 

I kicked and kicked until I got a door open. I delivered the dinner. I made it back home.

Soon thereafter, Dan received notice from a police officer that his car needed to go through inspection. We knew it would not pass and also didn't want to put a lot of money into fixing this car. It was time.

The day Dan went to a dealership to inquire after a car, the Hot Rod died in the middle of the road, only two blocks from our house. It was the alternator. Dan was proud that we had always said that we would drive it until it was dead, and then it died on the way to get a new car.

Oh did I mention that the hubcaps had fallen off? We are a classy bunch!

Dan got a new (not new, but Jolley-new) car. The Hot Rod was still eligible for a 2k trade-in despite its deadness because used cars are in such demand. It was a good day.

Let's not forget the many important events that happened in that car. Harris was almost born in that car. The Hot Rod took Dan took Dan to three different jobs in three different states--Florida, New Jersey, and Pennsylvania. Dan drove that car back and forth to Gainesville for his MBA. Thank you, Hot Rod, for transporting us and keeping us humble at the same time. I wish we still had it!! I honestly didn't care that it wasn't nice. Not-nice cars are kinda my jam.

Now, we just wait for the new car to be christened by vomit from one of the kids. Then it will really feel like our car.

The End.

Jolley Christmas Letter 2022

 

Friday, November 25, 2022

To All the People We Have Loved Before:

I’m stuffed to the gills, I’ve online-shopped to the hilt, I’ve lived life to the fullest, and I’m still in my bathrobe at 9:38 a.m. That’s right—it’s Black Friday/Christmas letter-writing day. I’ve assumed my position at the computer and locked the children out of the office. Let’s rock.

2022 has been a blessed year for the Pennsylvania Jolleys. January will mark three years since our residency began at the Commonwealth, and we enjoy the rural life we live but also our close proximity to many major cities. We still homeschool, and this year has been the best yet due to the wonderful friends we have made. Our kids have been extremely blessed by the association they experience with kids named things like Obadiah and Philemon. We are definitely the rough family in the group, and we are grateful that they put up with us.

June “Goodall” Jolley is 10 and loves animals, books, and science. She still attends horseback riding therapy every week, where she is one with the animals and nature. I’m still the slowest learner there and have resigned myself to be the best pooper scooper around because it’s the only chore I seem to do correctly. June regularly recites obscure facts about animals, to which I must simply nod because I have no idea if she’s correct. During one particularly exciting riding lesson, a fellow rider was attacked by a buzzing insect and started to scream “Bee! Bee!” to which June shouted, “Wasp, not bee! Bees have hairy bodies, and that bug has a shiny body!” The fellow rider found great comfort in that.

Gwen turned 8 this year and was baptized a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. It was the most wonderful day! Even though Dan regularly tries to reduce costs in our budget by offering persuasive arguments for Gwen to quit her dance classes, she has learned to tune out his repeated chants of “No! More! Dance!” and enjoys both ballet and jazz. Ever our resident extrovert, Gwen never wants to leave a party and claims she is bored within two minutes of arriving home. Gwen always seems to be injured (whether by accident or sibling-inflicted), but she gets lot of practice at bouncing back and is very resilient.

Harris is now 5 and was excited to hop on the homeschooling crazy train this year. He is learning to read and loves to do math problems. He and Beck pushed each other down the stairs in a big box one day in August, and Harris’ head met the hard floor and split open. Four staples later, and he’s doing just great. The real triumph of that day was that I remembered to grab the novel I was reading on the way to wait in the ER. Harris is sweet, shy, and a little anxious. Anxiety is the name of my game, but shyness is definitely outside of my wheelhouse, so we are learning how to navigate through it together. He cried through but eventually loved t-ball, and we are currently in the crying-through stage of a new wrestling season. But really, singlets should make everyone cry.

If Harris is anxious like me, Beck (3) throws caution to the wind like Dan. The boy never met a dangerous activity he didn’t like. We finally waved farewell to our baby years because we potty trained Beck earlier this year. I never thought I would be that mom who is sad about the closure of potty training, but I felt my eyes well up a few different times at the thought of being finished with diaper-changing. This is what happens to us once-shiny young moms turned crazy hormonal pooper scoopers. (Update: After not having an accident in months, Beck just peed his pants whilst I was penning this letter. My bittersweet feelings have quickly soured to straight bitter in about 3 seconds flat.)

Dan is the Man. He works, he cleans, he parents, he lawn cares, and he is currently cleaning up the Beck potty accident that just occurred. It is because of acts like these that he finally won our decade-long argument, and we went on a cruise as a family--despite my fear of boats, seasickness, overspending, tiny rooms, and buffets with massive amounts of jello. He loves the Hershey Company, his family, the Lord, and his country. But we won’t ask him to rank those categories here.

I turned 38 this year and celebrated by wearing a hoodie backwards without noticing for several hours of the day. I don’t know how someone doesn’t notice a giant hood protruding from her chin, but I managed. I have been much more proactive about managing my anxiety this year, and everyone in the family (and surrounding areas) has benefited.

We love the Lord Jesus Christ and are so happy to celebrate His birth again this year. He makes everything possible, and for Him we are forever grateful.

Love,

The Jolleys

Working through September, but Backwards.

These popped onto my computer in opposite-chronological order, so that's what we'll go with. 

This amazing drawing by June is called "The Mona Llama". You guessed it, that's the Mona Lisa with a llama twist.

We went to a really fun neighborhood garage sale a few weeks ago. Only in Pennsylvania will you ese a horse and cart tied up outside a garage sale.

Let's talk about how things are going on the homeschooling front. Now that they are behind me, I feel like I can honestly say that the first two years of homeschooling were very hard for me. Lots of amazing moments, but lots of really, truly hard ones. But for some reason, I felt urged to continue. I believe it has taken me this long to figure out my groove. The third year is going swimmingly. We are having so much fun, and I see lots of progress from each of the kids. We have the most amazing friendships from our co-ops, and our area is bursting with excellent learning opportunities. We spend a lot of time at science classes offered by local nature conservations, on hikes with friends, music lessons, sports practices, two co-ops, and at home reading great books. This year we are studying the middle ages and the Renaissance for history. Let me confess here that I'm one of those people who mock individuals who are deeply into this time period. But I've really gotten into it. 

Here we are at an apple cider press class. The absolute best apple cider I've ever tasted. Each kid brought a few apples from home, and the mix from all of the different types of apples was amazing. The teacher, Miss Lisa, was absolutely wonderful. She knows how to roll with the flow of 47 thousand kids. My hero.

Building a dam on one of our nature walks. Pennsylvania is so beautiful. 

Beck has been potty training, and of course he pooped his pants on this hike. I wasn't quite sure what to do with the poop. This is why I love my fellow co-op moms. They each have a zillion kids and are so chill about things like poop. I went to them with my problem, and my friend Lisa (who is an Amish Mennonite) said, "Heather, don't animals poop all over the woods? Just fling it." So fling it, I did. Into a bunch of trees it was flungeth.

Different day, different forest. This was one that was a little more difficult for the kids to do, but once we got to our landing spot, they spent 3 hours exploring. Beck was so happy. The boy does not like being contained by such restrictive modern inventions such as walls and roofs. He is totally one of the lost boys from Peter Pan.

There was a creek separating the two parts of the forests we explored. A brave 8-year-old girl named Abby ran what we termed the "Abby Ferry", helping each little kid cross the water so that the moms didn't have to get wet. Abby is my hero.

My friend Lisa, with a toddler next to her and her newborn baby in sling. She let me hold her baby for awhile, and it was heavenly. Anytime I think a hike is hard, I just look at Lisa, who is doing the same hike in a dress and carrying a newborn and four other kids. Also my hero.

It's Conference weekend. And it's been rainy. This is an excellent combination. Yesterday, we had a nice long morning to declutter and clean. My two favorite things! I was very jazzed about it because I'm 37 and live in rural Pennsylvania. There's no bigger rush than getting rid of toys. I also went through all of the kids' clothing and made a huge goodwill pile. All that plus listening to conference is all I need in life.

We also went out and picked pumpkins and bought mums and started getting set up for fall.

This is from a few weeks ago. My lovelies at their finest:

The End.

 

Cruisin' For a Bruisin'

Dan and I get along so well, but there are probably five "discussions" in our marriage that are ongoing. I finally won one a few years ago--the argument that would come up every December--and which we would periodically revisit throughout the year--of whether it might have been better for George Bailey to take Mr. Potter's job offer in the movie It's a Wonderful Life. Dan once ventured that George could have taken the large salary that Mr. Potter promised him and reinvested it in the town, while also being able to keep a close eye on Mr. Potter and use his personal influence over Mr. Potter's decisions. WHAT!?!?! Does anyone else remember Pottersville?!?! I was always adamant that there are certain people whose motives are so bad that you can't make any deals with them. Of course, I think there are times when people feel like they can't work with people who just disagree with them. This isn't a Mr. Potter situation at all, but rather one of the most important things we must do--work with people who differ from us. But Mr. Potter was rooted in evil. Eventually, Dan agreed with me, and now you can often hear the phrase, "Don't make a deal with Mr. Potter" in the Jolley household when we feel like there is a sketchy situation that should be avoided.

I don't know why I told you all that except that my ego is such that I must tell you about a time that Dan gave in before I tell you about a time I gave in. Which is how we ended up going on a cruise. For years, Dan has wanted to take our family on a cruise. It seemed that everyone around us was always returning from a cruise, which prompted us to constantly poll friends when we were together. Have you cruised? Did you like it? Is it worth the money? Did you get sick?

Sickness was my main fear of cruising. I'm the type of person that gets carsick just going to the grocery store. I pictured myself stuck on a huge ship, trapped in a tiny bedroom whilst swaying back and forth, back and forth. This caused feelings of panic. But somehow I finally let all of our close friends convince me to try it out.

We left our house for the Philly airport at 1:00 a.m. I kid you not. 

I have a dear friend who cruises often, and she prepped us for the trip. By "prepped us", I do not mean "helped us prep". I mean she did everything. I kept having this mentality that we would just figure it out when we got there, that surely since it was a vacation we could just show up, and it would be fine. Now that we have cruised, I can see we would have had a much harder time had she not prepped us. On top of helping us check in ahead of time, showing me how to get my luggage tickets, bringing things for us to use to help organize our stuff in the tiny rooms, helping me procure the appropriate covid testing  kits required for the ship, helping me schedule out our days, and about a zillion other things, she also made these cute name tag magnets for our doors so that we could find them easier. I'm not the type of mom that ever makes cutesy things for anything, and I gained a huge appreciation for moms who do because it was so helpful and just so thoughtful too.

This is the type of picture you get when a five-year-old takes it.

Which isn't all that different from when I'm the one taking the photo.

We had a lot of fun! The kids really enjoyed all of the amenities of the boat, and I enjoyed not cooking or cleaning. I could have kissed the people who cleaned up our rooms 3 times a day. 

Gwen takes after Dan in the rock climbing department. Straight to the top with seemingly no problems. Looking down doesn't even bother them.

June and I went up halfway and came right back down. I was so freaked out!!!

Dan and the three older kids went the silent disco party one night and had a blast.  

My kids loved taking the stairs to visit this Clifford the Dog every day.

Dressy night on the ship was actually a lot more fun than I thought it would be. Dressing up feels good!

Do you think it's alright if I use this photo for our Christmas card this year or is it too dark? It might be the best I can do.

And worst-photographer-of-all award goes to the nice passerby who took this photo. She took several, and they are all like this but I'm fine with it because I have finally been outdone by someone else with regard to taking bad photos.

One of our stops was to Nassau, Bahamas. A lot of people told us that they just stayed on the boat this day because they didn't like it, but we really liked it!

The best day of all, though was our day at the private beach of Coco Cay. It was amazing.

We were the only ship there that day. It was so unbusy. There were really good tacos with tortillas made from scratch. We saw a shark when we went snorkeling. We had fun at the pool. We didn't have to worry about packing towels, snacks, chairs, etc. I'm such a beach bum--emphasis on bum. I don't like to do hard work to go to the beach. It was amazing.

Overall verdict of the cruise? Dan and the kids LOVED it, and I liked it a lot. I'm not sure if I could ever be one of those people that goes on a cruise every year for vacation. The food kinda got to me after awhile. I didn't think it was super good. I also feel like it's a lot of money, and I'd rather just get to a beach and stay there. Coco Cay might make me take a cruise again though.

The End.

Gwen is a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. And Harris broke his head open.

 At the beginning of August, Gwen was baptized. It was quite the shindig. Both sets of grandparents flew out for it, and many friends from church, homeschool co-op, public school, sports, and our neighborhood came. It was an extra special day.

Grandma Sandy and June played a duet together. It was the primary song "Baptism". June was pretty hit or miss with the song, and I was more nervous for how it would go than anything else that day. But she knocked it out of the park.

Gwen's primary teacher, Vanessa Henson, gave a talk about the "3 bears" of being baptized. Bearing the name of Jesus Christ, bearing each other's burdens, and bearing our testimony. It was such a great talk.

Grandma Kristi gave a talk about the Holy Ghost. She told a story about when Dan was a young boy at Christmastime. His family was gathered around and singing carols. He turned to his mom and said, "This feeling I'm feeling . . . is this the Holy Ghost?" And she confirmed that it was. So simple and so beautiful. All were touched by her story.

Dan baptized Gwen, and June and my mom were the witnesses. Dan also conferred the gift of the Holy Ghost on her. After the ordinances were finished, June ran up and gave her a big jumping hug. They were both so excited that day.

Many of our friends were able to stay for lunch. I had friends drive from hours away to see us and also to help. It was one of those amazing days where I just couldn't fathom why we have such good friends. We are pretty weird, and yet people love us anyway.

And also, Harris broke his head open. He and Beck were pushing each other down the stairs in some cardboard boxes, and his head crashed into the floor and split clean open.

I took him to the ER, and they stapled him up with four staples. A couple of weeks later, he went in for oral surgery to get his tongue tie clipped. He also had to get new glasses. He's scared of everything and always gets injured, whilst Beck has no fear and rarely gets hurt. It's just weird.

The End.